


Devotion

by vomitmatsu



Category: Deep-Sea Prisoner, 灰色庭園 | Haiiro Teien | The Gray Garden
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Jealousy, M/M, Referenced Satanivlis, Riding, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:07:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25837774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vomitmatsu/pseuds/vomitmatsu
Summary: Satanick's been moping for a few days after Ivlis rejected him once again, and Envi decides to cheer him up.
Relationships: Envi/Satanick (Gray Garden)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 28





	Devotion

**Author's Note:**

> this was very much based of an rp i had with a friend that made me feel very warm for envi and this pairing and I had to write it in fic form haha

Rain thrummed against the windows, as it had done nonstop for the past… what, two? Three days?

People were already starting to seriously complain, and Envi had to stop Roc from barging into the Devil’s chambers demanding he cheers up so that he and his shrimp could go on a date, or whatever it was that he’d said. Envi didn’t care much what Roc or any of his fellow demons wanted, just like they didn’t seem to care much about what their boss needed. 

What  _ did  _ the Devil need, Envi wondered. Or rather, what was it that the Devil wanted and that Envi could provide? Certainly it wasn’t that pitiful flame Devil, for Satanick had blatantly refused any proposition of mind break and brainwashing of the man. Should he just fetch Lil again? Would she agree to come cheer up her husband once more?

Could Envi do anything that could help Satanick in the long term?

Unable to find the answers by himself, Envi decided to ask the man himself. He knocked on the door of his bedroom carefully - loud enough so that the other would hear him, but not so much that he would wake him up were he to be in a depressive slumber.

“Who is it?” a tired voice asked, devoid of the cheerful energy Satanick normally exhibited. Envi’s heart would never not hurt at the sound, no matter how often such thing happened.

“It’s Envi,” he replied. “Can I come in?”

There was a moment of silence during which the Devil no doubt pondered on Envi’s question, before Satanick let out a barely audible “Sure.”

Without further hesitation Envi stepped into the room, frowning at the darkness that surrounded him. The only light was seeping from the window, but the sky was so obscured by the heavy rain clouds that it was difficult to see a thing. Still, Envi could discern Satanick’s form under the blankets, clinging to a rabbit plush and sniffling.

Though he looked truly pitiful, there was something about it that was undoubtedly charming and cute. Envi felt embarrassed by the thought, knowing he shouldn’t dwell on such feelings when his Devil’s heart was in such pain, but he couldn’t help it. 

“Is there anything I can do for you, Lord Devil?” he asked. 

“Hmm…” Satanick hummed, not even turning around to look at him and instead curling up further into himself, his face buried against the plush’s synthetic fur. “You could end pathetic me’s suffering and kill me right here,” he said, peeking over his shoulder. “You already do so much, Envi… this world would be so much better if you were in charge. And if I were dead then I wouldn’t feel such pain anymore, yeah?”

Envi frowned. Though hearing the words pained him, Envi knew better than to take them at face value. This was nothing more than exaggerated theatrics. Satanick would never truly beg for death. “You and I both know I could never do that. Besides, you are wrong. I could never do the things you do.”

Satanick heaved the deepest sigh Envi had ever heard, as if the weight of the entire world hung on his shoulder - which, to be fair to the Devil, it kind of did. “You’re probably the only person who thinks that way…”

“Lord Devil…” Envi trailed off.

“...He hates me. He always did. Why wouldn’t he?” Satanick muttered to himself before Envi could think of anything to cheer him up. “But even when I’m nice… even when I dote on him and spoil him and cover him in love and affection, he still feels nothing but hatred… I don’t understand… What’s the point of even trying at all?” he asked. “Ahh, I wish I could forget him… wouldn’t that be nice? Forget and never fall in love ever again. Then perhaps my pathetic little heart wouldn’t have to break any more…”

The lump in Envi’s throat was so large it was a miracle he managed to speak. The idea that Satanick could feel so pained and unloved while Envi held nothing but affection and respect for him might have made him cry if he were any weaker. “He doesn’t understand what he’s missing out on,” he responded. “Sir Devil, though I can already guess your answer, I have to remind you that should you say the word I will be more than happy to make the flame Devil pay.”

The only reason why Envi had never laid a finger on the pitiful man that Satanick had somehow fallen for was because he knew Satanick would never forgive him for it. That damned Ivlis could count himself lucky for that, but as soon as Satanick managed to get over him he would feel sorry for ever rejecting him. If he thought Satanick was cruel…

“Don’t,” Satanick brought him out of his thoughts by turning around and properly facing him, his usually bright purple eyes looking so dim. “You know I don’t want that.”

Envi’s frown deepened. “I know,” he replied, suddenly unable to meet Sattanick’s eyes. “I just wish to punish whoever brings you harm, is all.”

Satanick kept staring at him, as if studying him. It made Envi feel self conscious and tense, but he didn’t dare say anything about it - that was, until Satanick spoke up again.

“Why do you care so much, Envi?” he asked. “Is it because I’m your Devil? Surely the others don’t seem to bother much despite that. You don’t have to, either. You’ve seen how pathetic I can be, after all.”

Envi shook his head slowly. “I don’t believe you to be pathetic. Though I feel an obligation to serve you as a subordinate, my care runs far deeper than that, and so does my desire to help,” he replied, before immediately regretting it. What was he saying? There was no way he could declare his love in such a situation. There was no way he could declare his love _ ever _ .

Satanick remained silent for a while, before he reached to take Envi’s hand in his own. The motion caused Envi to tense up even more, eyes staring down at their joined hands. Staring at the way Satanick’s thumb rubbed circles against his skin. But it was the Devil’s words that really did him in: “...Will you climb into bed with me, Envi?”

“H-huh?” Envi eloquently replied, eyes widening. Was he hallucinating? Dreaming? Was Satanick playing a cruel prank on him?

“I want a hug, and… I’d ask you to fetch Artamos, but I’m tired of forcing people to give me company. But it wouldn’t be forceful with you, would it?” Satanick explained himself, as if it made it better in any way.

Envi hesitated, swallowing heavily. “It… wouldn’t be, no,” he admitted with a small nod, though he remained paralyzed by Satanick’s bedside. 

A faint smile illuminated the other’s face, and Envi was certain he was about to crumble into dust. “Come in then,” he said, scooting further into bed and patting the now empty space besides him.

Envi looked around himself as if searching for an escape, before taking a deep breath and nodding once again. He removed his shoes and slowly climbed in the bed, giving the other the time to change his mind and kick him out.

Of course, Satanick did not. Instead, as soon as Envi was laid down completely rigid against the overly-soft mattress, Satanick was already wrapping his arms around him. He clung to Envi like a koala to a tree, his head resting against Envi’s chest. “Thank you,” he sighed, eyes fluttering shut. “If only I’d fallen for someone like you, surely things would’ve been much easier, right?”

The words stung so bad Envi swore they had materialised and personally stabbed through his heart. It was so much that he had trouble feeling any happiness over the way Satanick cuddled against him, though as he felt the Devil relax against him Envi couldn’t help but feel just a little lighter. “...Perhaps,” he eventually managed to respond, hesitantly laying an arm around Satanick, his hand resting on his side.

There was a beat of silence during which Satanick shifted just slightly to make himself more comfortable before nuzzling Envi’s chest, a small laugh escaping him. “Your heart’s racing,” he noted, which worked to make Envi blush. “Are you nervous?”

To say he was nervous was the biggest understatement of the year. “Slightly,” Envi muttered, feeling his heart doing somersault in his chest. He wished he could rip it out right here and then, but it felt like a little bit much. 

“And why is that?” Satanick asked, resting his chin on Envi’s chest. His purple eyes sunk into Envi’s own in a way Envi was certain was reaching into his very soul. “Afraid I’ll do something bad?”

Well, at least his Devil had it in him to be playful. “Not necessarily, no,” he replied, because it was true. His problem was that he wished he would, though he didn’t voice that out loud. “It’s simply nerves. I’m sure you can understand how someone like me might feel stress upon laying next to someone like you, lord Devil.”

Satanick hummed. “I see. Well… It’s okay. I’m too sad to do anything. Though…” he trailed off, finally tearing his eyes off of Envi’s face. “Sex might be a nice way to cheer up. Maybe? I dunno…”

Envi held his breath. He felt like a hopeful fool for thinking his Devil was insinuating what he thought he was insinuating, but… Satanick was not one to bring these things up without a clear purpose. “...I aim to help you however I can,” he replied, his voice coming out a tad weaker than he would prefer. 

Satanick stayed quiet for a moment. “I told you. I don’t wanna force people right now. It’s depressing. You’d have to really want it,” he then said. “Do you want to have sex, Envi?”

“....” Envi harshly bit on his tongue. Was he this desperate, this pathetic that he would insist?

.... Yes, yes he was. If only because he knew it would help Satanick feel better. Obviously there was no other reason behind the way he reached for the other’s head, fingers running through his hair and freeing him of the tangles he encountered on the way. 

“I do,” he finally replied, ignoring the way his heart raced and the way his face reddened as best as he could.

There was nothing he could do to hide it from Satanick though. The other’s purple eyes searched his face, his gaze softer than usual. There was something akin to care, and perhaps fondness, in his eyes, though Envi was certain he was just being delusional.

Still he held onto those delusions, allowing Satanick to shift and pull himself closer to him. A second later and their lips were touching, the Devil pressing a hand against Envi’s cheek and keeping him from even trying to pull away - not that Envi would ever dare. 

Satanick’s lips were soft. They had somewhat of a salty aftertaste which no doubt had come from tears shed over that worthless flame Devil. The thought soured the kiss if only for a moment, before Satanick leaned further into him and pressed his tongue inside his mouth. Any negativity melted away from him, and he lost his hand in Satanick’s hair and welcomed him eagerly. Tongues pressed against each other, sharp teeth teasingly scraping against Envi’s bottom lip and causing him to shudder while Satanick chuckled. 

His face was on fire. So was his lower stomach.

Satanick pulled away all too early, his warm gaze stealing all of Envi’s breath away. 

“Will you ride me, Envi?” Satanick asked in a murmur, lips brushing against Envi’s own in a cruel reminder of what he would now only be able to cherish as a memory.

Envi’s voice was nowhere to be found. All he could do was nod and watch breathlessly as Satanick grinned and laid on his back next to him, patting his lap expectantly. 

“Alright then, come on.”

At least the other was smiling. A glance over to the window showed him that the pouring rain had turned to nothing more than a light drizzle, causing him to sigh with relief before he moved himself and climbed on top of Satanick’s lap after removing his pants and underwear. 

“Finger yourself for me,” Satanick ordered after catching Envi’s expectant look, his hands resting on Envi’s thighs, his thumbs rubbing circles against his skin.

Envi wished he could stop his face from burning so much and making this situation much more embarrassing than it had to be. He was simply doing his Devil a favor, helping serve him and make him feel better, that was all this was. 

No matter how hard he tried to convince himself however his fingers still trembled as he removed his glove. The patient and curious gaze Satanick gave him made it easy for his dick to reach full hardness before Envi had even touched himself at all - and of course the other had to comment on it.

“Look at you. Eager, eh?” he joked. “Can’t blame you, anyone would be excited to fuck themselves on wonderful me’s dick~”

Envi’s eyebrows twitched, but he didn’t say anything. It was better to let Satanick have some fun than tell him off and risk ruining the mood he had helped build back up. Still he wished he could hit him in the face, and reminded himself to do so once the Devil was feeling better. As of now, he let out a small sigh and licked at his own fingers, hurrying if only out of shame for the display he was offering.

He pressed two fingers in at first, closing his eyes in hopes to ignore Satanick’s warm gaze on him. It made him feel so small and shameful. He didn’t often feel that way, and he didn’t particularly enjoy it. Despite how much he cherished having the Devil’s attention on himself.

He wasn’t exactly used to this. He wasn’t as horny as Satanick, nor did he usually tend to be the one taking it. It wasn’t like he minded much, though. He’d do anything for him. And he had very much dreamed of such thing happening. 

Too many times for him not to be ashamed.

He let out a shaky exhale as his fingers pressed deeper and deeper inside of him, until he reached his knuckles. He wasn’t exactly looking to please himself, but he couldn’t help a shudder as his fingers brushed against his prostate on their way out. He managed to bite back a moan, though that didn’t last long as he felt Satanick’s hand wrap around his member and start stroking him slowly.

He blinked an eye open, finding Satanick smiling below him. The sight made his heart jump. “What are you—“ he tried to ask, before biting at his lower lip to silence himself as another moan tried to crawl up his throat. “L-lord Devil—“

“Just Satanick is fine while you’re here,” Satanick corrected him, giving Envi’s dick a squeeze.

“I could never- ah…!” he couldn’t keep it down this time, his face burning a bright red at the sound of his own voice. “S-shit…”

Satanick laughed. It was a light and airy sound that immediately made the air so much easier to breathe, the sound distracting Envi from his own shame. “There’s no need to be shy, come on~! It’s not fun if you’re not moaning and whining for me, right? I wanna hear your voice~!”

Envi’s expression contorted in a grimace, but he didn’t dare say a thing. Instead he focused on stretching himself further and keeping his breathing steady, adding another finger and spreading them inside of himself. He didn’t want to think about Satanick’s words, knowing him to be playing around, knowing him to be considering this as nothing more than a one time thing. 

Which was fine. Envi didn’t mind. He just wanted to make his Devil happy and put a stop to the rain. 

Still he was way too ashamed to allow himself to make much more sounds as he slowly fucked himself with his fingers. He hated himself for the small gasps and moans that did escape him, the only thing making him feel better being how pleased Satanick seemed to be at all of them.

“I… I think I’m ready,” he said in a quiet, strained voice after a few moments, pulling his fingers out of himself. He didn’t want to put up a spectacle for any longer than he had to.

“Then you know what’s left to do, don’t you?” Satanick replied, purple eyes glowing just a bit brighter than they had earlier. Hopefully it wasn’t simply malice as he teased Envi but because he was legitimately feeling more lively. 

Envi nodded wordlessly, helping to free the Devil’s cock and swallowing as he ran his fingers along his length. His heart was beating so hard and fast it was the only thing he could hear, while his mind was so overrun with lust that if he didn’t know better he would believe that Satanick was using magic on him.

But he wasn’t. This was all him. His thoughts, his desires. Which were finally going to be fulfilled.

With a small motion Satanick used magic to coat his member with lube, looking at Envi expectantly. Not wanting to disappoint, Envi nodded quickly, shifting to position himself on top of his cock which he held upright against his hole, before he slowly sunk down on it.

“H-hnn… Lord Devil…” he couldn’t help but mutter as he felt the other’s cock twitching inside of him, his hastily done preparation coming back to bite him as he felt the other’s member stretch him even more than he had expected. 

Envi felt himself shudder, clenching around Satanick’s member and causing the other’s breath to hitch. The noticeable sound grabbed Envi’s attention, and his heart jumped in his chest as he laid his eyes on Satanick. 

The other’s eyes had fluttered shut, while his mouth hung open. Small pants escaped him and, as Envi sunk further onto his cock, so did moans. They were quiet, but slightly higher pitched than usual, the sound hitting Envi right in the dick - and heart, but he tried to ignore that. Arousal took control of him and he shoved himself the rest of the way down, knocking all the breath out of his lungs but tearing a gasp and a surprised moan out of the other.

“Aaahaha, sooo excited, Envi~ So cute, so cute~!” Satanick commented, voice strained with arousal as he ground his hips up against Envi in an attempt to reach even deeper inside of him.

Envi barely registered the remark, the world whirling around him as he tried accommodating to the other’s length. He felt so full, so warm, and, if he closed his eyes and played pretend, so loved. His legs twitched, any small movements of his body sending a shockwave of pleasure through him, and it took him a little while to actually push himself back up on the other’s cock. 

It was harder to keep quiet as he started to move up and down Satanick’s cock. The Devil was making it worse by grinding his hips up into him, meeting him always and hitting right at Envi’s prostate once he managed to locate it using Envi’s shameful reactions to all of his movements. Envi held his breath and bit at his tongue, to no avail, shameful groans forcing themselves out of his throat as he shook on top of his Devil.

It felt good. To suddenly have him inside. It was much better than in any of the dreams he had chastised himself for. The sound of Satanick’s panting, the moans that kept growing in number, the softness of his expression and the knowledge that he was the one pleasing him… Envi swore he had never been happier in his long, long life. 

“Lord Devil… Lord Devil…” he muttered under his breath, his pace quickening as he wanted more, more, more. “S-sata—“ he even allowed himself to moan — that was, until his voice died in his throat upon hearing his Devil speak:

“Roa— s-shit,” was all he said, stopping himself midway through in awareness of the grave mistake he was making. But it was too late. Envi knew what he was going to say, and Satanick didn’t try much harder to hide it nor did he care to apologize for it.

Roach. Or “roachie”, as Satanick had started affectionately calling him. Ivlis. 

Of course. Of course he would be thinking of that damned, worthless flame Devil even now, even after everything Envi was doing. Which his eyes still closed, Envi could imagine the other was picturing Ivlis to be on top of him. His own voice was surely turning into Ivlis’ pitiful whines and whimpers. He was so much more vocal than Envi, he was sure Satanick loved that. 

Just like he loved everything about Ivlis, and didn’t care about any of Envi’s efforts.

Any happiness and satisfaction that Envi might have felt turned into bitterness and jealousy. He braced himself on Satanick’s shoulders, angry eyes glaring at the oblivious Devil, before he quickened his pace. He slammed himself down onto his cock with such force he felt the impact of the thrust through his entire body. He didn’t care. He did it again, and again, and again, bringing gasps and moans out of Satanick and making his body twitch and shudder under his own.

The way he was certain Ivlis had never done before because there was no way Ivlis would ever willingly do this. Satanick was always doing all the work with him because Ivlis was too stupid to accept his affection. Envi hated him. He hated him, hated him, hated him - but most of all he hated the fact that he couldn’t even make him pay for holding Satanick’s attention all to himself. 

Because that would make Satanick sad. And that was the last thing Envi wanted.

His eyes stung, his vision blurring, and Envi convinced himself it was all from arousal and nothing else. Satanick helped, with the way he kept stroking him, matching Envi’s pace even when it grew so quick and overwhelming. 

He loved him so much.

“Lord Devil… Lord Devil…” he panted, “please look at me…”

Surprisingly, Satanick obliged. He blinked his eyes open and looked straight into Envi’s eyes with a gaze so feverish Envi could come from the mere sight. Satanick sent him a smile, and when Envi pressed a hand against his cheek he covered it with his own palm. “Envi…” he sighed out, his voice so soft, so filled with arousal and what could only be considered affection..

Envi didn’t understand him. He wished that Satanick could at least make his lack of love for him more obvious so that he wouldn’t have to suffer from these cruel reminders of the way he could always be treated were Satanick to be his. Instead he had to play with his heart, twisting it and stabbing him with every word and every look and every touch. 

It was intoxicating. Envi wanted him to stop yet at the same time couldn’t help but never want it to end. He never wanted Satanick to take his eyes off him, never wanted their hands to separate, never wanted to hear him say anything but his name. 

He had to blink back tears that threatened to fall, likely from how overwhelming the Devil’s cock felt inside of him. Nothing else. 

There was no reason for him to feel hurt. 

None at all.

Not when he could feel Satanick’s hips starting to stutter, the volume of his moans rising. The other was close, and so was Envi. 

He shifted slightly, angling himself to allow for the other’s cock to reach deep, so deep inside of him Envi thought he was going to black out each time he slammed himself down on the other. The pleasure was mind numbing, enough for Envi to forget the torrent of negativity that had threatened to drown him. Instead he lost himself in bliss, eyes falling shut as the world tilted dangerously.

It didn’t take much longer for him to orgasm. He slammed himself down on Satanick’s cock, feeling his release sputter out of his member and onto his Devil’s hand as he panted and moaned, ignoring his shame for a second as he trembled on top of the other. His body tightened around the throbbing member inside of him enough to bring Satanick over the edge, and Envi let out a small whimper as he felt hot spunk fill him. 

“F-fuck…” he muttered, voice coming out shockingly shaky. It took him a long time to steady his breathing and stop his entire body from shaking, and an even longer time to get himself to take his hand off of Satanick’s cheek and push himself off his spent cock.

“Ahhh~ That was fun,” Satanick sighed out as Envi got up, his smile just as bright as it normally was. A quick look at the window showed that the rain had finally cleared up, birds singing with excitement on their perches over the spiraled trees. “Didn’t expect this from you, Envi! Ahaha, we should do it again!”

Envi hated how much his heart sunk at the proposition. “I am glad if you are feeling better, Lord Devil,” he responded, managing to finally get his tone as flat as it usually was. There was a small, uncomfortable pause during which their eyes lingered on each other for just a bit too long, before Envi turned around. “I shall clean the mess I have made, just one second.”

Before Envi could walk away though, Satanick grabbed his hand. It felt warm. “Wait,” the Devil called out, and when Envi looked back down at him, his smile grew softer. Sweeter. “Thank you, Envi. Really.”

Envi wanted nothing more than to lean down and kiss him, but instead he nodded and reluctantly pried his hand out of Satanick’s hold. “Anything for you, Lord Devil.”

**Author's Note:**

> Woooo first dsp fic hiii  
> I'm @bottomstnk on twitter if you wanna be friends~


End file.
